Shelldred & The Rat Express

Shelldred the Time-Traveler's Guide to Totally Not Ruining History (Probably)

Meet Shelldred-a bedazzled, genius (self-proclaimed), time-hopping turtle with a talent for making reality his personal playground. Armed with questionable inventions and an even more questionable moral compass, Shelldred roams the timelines in search of wealth, glory, and the occasional well-aged cheese.

This time, his latest totally intentional time-travel maneuver drops him smack-dab in the middle of medieval Europe-a land of questionable hygiene, bad economic decisions, and, oh yeah, rats. Lots of them. But where others see a rodent-infested nightmare, Shelldred sees an opportunity. Why let a few scurrying disease-loaves go to waste when they could be... profitable?

Enter Rat Express-the world's first (and possibly last) rodent-powered postal service! No horses, no wages, no problem. It's fast, it's efficient, and it's definitely going to make him rich. The medieval masses are eating it up, and for a brief, shining moment, Shelldred is on top of the world.

What could possibly go wrong?

(Well... Chase, his eternally unimpressed snail sidekick, has several answers to that question. And history might have a few more.)

Darkly hilarious, chaotically absurd, and packed with enough historical whoopsies to make a historian weep, this time-traveling escapade is perfect for fans of irreverent humor, multiversal mayhem, and deeply flawed geniuses with just enough luck to be dangerous.

Step into Shelldred's shell-just don't expect history to survive unscathed.