Ghosteater

"My name is Jack Stephens. I'm a paranormal investigator, not one of those quacks that go around pretending to see ghosts and pissing myself on camera. I actually help people cope with real and imagined hauntings. It took me awhile to understand it and I still find I have a lot to learn, but the basics are when you die an energy is released. To someone cursed with the "sight" ,like me, it appears as a faintly glowing fire that either gently smolders or rages out of control and the fumes swirl out into the air. The difference is up to the individual. I've seen old ladies scream and rail it's not their time and when they pass a fire burns from their bodies that engulfs the room, sending plumes of bluish smoke high into the air. While a peaceful or unexpected death might only release a small flame and a puff of smoke. In ancient times this energy that is released into the world was called magic and a select few could harness its power. In rare cases if the power or will was great enough, the energy released would form a haunting. Some hauntings are simply echoes of the persons previous life. A broom sweeping a dirty floor or light switches turning on and off. Most are attached to a place or object. Some however have a portion of the departed's wants and needs. Those are the most rare and most dangerous. Once birthed the hauntings will eventually fade from expending their energy, but their very nature acts as a magnet drawing more energy from the world to feed them. If given enough power a haunting can become a truly frightening thing to behold.
Sounds fun, sounds exciting doesn't it. Chasing ghosts and solving mysteries. Well it's not. It's scary as hell now matter how many times you see some dead bitch floating all over someone's house flipping light switches and vomiting blood all over the walls. Oh, and I almost forgot. The side effects of being able to see all this crap, is I've acquired a taste for this energy. They call me a ghost eater, sounds gross. Well it is, I draw the stuff into my body like a sponge, not enough to stop a ghost cold mind you. I'm not that lucky, but enough to piss them off. Did I tell you how rewarding the job is too? Yeah right. They all call you crying wanting you to come help them get the ghost out of their house because they can't afford to move and no one will buy the house with zombies rattling around in it. But, guess what. You go in and bust a few ghost heads and sure a few areas of the house gets trashed, but are they grateful? NO! They want to sue you and blame you for the whole mess. Had to get a lawyer to draw up a contract and start charging people up front. Why don't I get a normal job you say? Well, no one wants to hire the crazy person who talks to the leaky sink. Plus, this damn "taste" I've acquired is more like an addiction. Funny thing is, I act like a magnet too, I draw the stuff to me at all times. My home is practically floating in the stuff.
Well, I'm forty nine, going on fifty now and I reckon, I've been chasing ghosts for about ten years now. I'm not getting any younger and lately the jobs have been few and far between. So I've been told that I should write down my experiences. Maybe, what you now read will be helpful for getting rid of that pesky ghost in your attic or maybe you'll get a laugh out of it. Anyways, try not to take what your about to read and use it for ill and try to harness the energy of the dead to take over the world or your neighborhood."