Coming to Terms

COMING TO TERMS: INSIGHTS FOR CHILDREN AFFECTED BY ADDICTION IN THE FAMILY. Blending visually stunning artwork with easy to digest concepts this book speaks directly to pre-teens, tweens and teens who are affected by a parent or caretakers' disease of addiction or substance use disorder. This book offers the language to better understand their experiences, feelings, and worthiness. It encourages communication and connection, laying the groundwork to help them feel seen, understood, valued, and have their needs met by others. Included are terms and concepts related to the impact and nature of addiction, the consequences for children affected by addiction in the family, and, most importantly, concepts on healing, resilience, and self-care.

"I didn't Cause it. I can't Control it. I can't Cure it. But I can Care for myself by Communicating my feelings, making healthy Choices, and Celebrating myself." Exploring and expanding upon the 7 C's of Hazelden Betty Ford Center, this book offers definitions, clarification, and context for these, plus many additional "C" words as they relate to addiction or healthy choices.

Some of these topics and terms include:

The Chaos of living with addiction in the family

Counseling and therapy

Circuitry of the brain and the Cravings of addiction

Cycles of shame and addiction

Conflict, dysregulation and the human stress response

Consequences of the common Coping mechanisms

Change and breaking the Cycle

Connection and belonging

Calming and somatic regulation techniques

Creativity vs Comparison

Clear and Consistent boundary setting

Cultivating authenticity and vulnerability

Compassion and empathy

Contradictions and two things are true thinking

Codependency and enabling

Challenge as a way to build resilience

Celebration and gratitude

Critical thinking, validation and accountability

This book encourages children impacted by a parents' addiction to recognize the difference between the person and their behaviors as it relates to their disease-leaving room for both love and healthy boundary setting. The reader is given permission to feel all of their feelings with curiosity rather than judgement, and to recognize and forgive themselves for things beyond their ability to control. It includes helpful suggestions and tips, as well as inspiring quotes on these important topics. Throughout the book, children are reminded that they are worthy of love, belonging, and having their needs met.